Joan Collins Does Glamour

Joan Collins recently presented a one-off TV programme, a sort of makeover show called Joan Collins Does Glamour, for British network ITV. Although we didn’t manage to see it in full, someone has put some clips on YouTube; and despite the fact that through the 00’s the ‘makeover show’ TV format has been done to death, this really is quite good and it works, simply because Joan Collins is so funny in it and has such presence still. Someone really, really needs to give her a full series doing something like this, because she’s just perfect for it.


A few observations:

How can Joan Collins be in her mid seventies?! She honestly looks and seems at least 20 years younger, and even her hands (the usual giveaway) don’t betray her real age. Love her resolutely ‘un fashion’ and quite dated looking, but undeniably glamorous, outfit choices too.

Love that in the supermarket she thinks bananas cost 68p (about $1.10) each and that Andrex, the bathroom tissue advertised with a puppy, is actually for dogs (and what on earth is that contraption they strapped granny into?! It’s like a wheelchair attached to a shopping trolley, making the whole thing all the more surreal as they go around the supermarket together).

“I don’t mean to be rude, it’s just, um, fleece should be on sheep”

“I think you need to do a little bit more, because moisturiser is not enough”

“You’re wearing something that I would dust my silver with”

“Somebody you know just died? You look like you want to commit suicide”

“I’m on my fifth [husband]”

“I don’t quite see the point of having flesh coming out like that”

Classic! Perfect light relief for the day.